Freshly cut roses. Sumptuous Marie Antoinette-style birthday cakes. Vintage Liberty dresses in Strawberry Thief fabric. Shetland ponies. These are some of the ingredients of my Instagram posts featuring my kids. I wouldn’t call myself a “sharent” by any means – someone who overshares their children’s intimate lives on social media in one long, parental “humblebrag”. But whenever I do post, it is picture-perfect. My kids look like they’ve walked straight out of a fairytale. But is it naff? Like tablescaping your kids? A form of digital narcissism? Is it, in its own unique way, a parental kind of “thirst trap”? To an extent, I’m luring others into a fantasy that doesn’t exist. I like to project a wonderfully idyllic life as a single mum... when quite frankly, it isn’t. It’s like when people try to woo their ex-partners back by posting shots of themselves half-naked and having the best time of their lives, despite crying into their pillow heartbroken all day and night. Some mums are professionals at posting perfect dreamy shots of their kids. Look no further than Carrie Johnson, Tamara Ecclestone, Stacey Solomon, and Kate and Rio Ferdinand. For celebrities and influencers, a picture-perfect ideal is the norm on social media – there are lots of cream interiors and matching Christmas jumpers. They might be promoting a homeware brand, or tagging a pram they got for free. Even when it’s tastefully done, like the former PM’s wife’s Instagram, it always gives the impression that motherhood is wondrous. That life is one big, happy Timotei advert. Even when celebrities try to be more candid, it doesn’t work. Mum-of-two Millie Mackintosh, formerly of Made in Chelsea, recently posted a “toddler tornado dump” on her Instagram. “I feel like it’s so easy to always share the nice, polished, life,” she wrote. “Well, today, I’m here to break that pattern.” The glimpse “into the delightful chaos” of Mackintosh’s maternal life included photos of a toothbrush and toothpaste on a bathroom basin, a bedroom littered with hair bows, and a make-up drawer with a few brown concealer stains on it. Really? Is that as bad as motherhood gets? For me, it’s simply more interesting to post magical rather than mundane shots. But why on earth do I want to present my kids as if they’re living in one long, tasteful pastel-coloured dream, where everything looks enchanting? No messy hair. No sleep deprivation. No kids bored out of their minds. I don’t require a filter, either – I’m already looking at life through rose-tinted spectacles, and expecting everyone else to do the same. But am I totally deluded? And, more than anything, could it be damaging to my children? Dr Charlotte Armitage, who is currently the duty-of-care psychologist on ITV’s Big Brother, has big concerns. “First of all, it’s impacting the relationship between the parent and a child because the relationship is contingent on the creation of these images and the number of likes that follow,” she says, adding that when you are “truly happy” with your situation, “you don’t tend to post perfect images”. It’s more important to ask ourselves the question of why we feel the need to present this kind of picture-perfect image of ourselves to the world. Is it because, in reality, we are discontented with our lives? Dr Charlotte Armitage, psychologist As parents, she continues, we are modelling behaviours to our children. “They learn by imitation – if mum is taking photos and seeking validation from likes, the child starts to become validated by these likes themselves and will develop an external focus of control; they will learn that validation comes from what others think of them. This is unhealthy because, throughout life, a child’s self-esteem and self-worth become based on what others think about them rather than how they feel about themselves.” The key, she says, is realising we shouldn’t use social media to fulfil our self-worth. “It’s more important to ask ourselves the question of why we feel the need to present this kind of picture-perfect image of ourselves to the world,” she says. “Is it because, in reality, we are discontented with our lives?” According to research, the average child today has had their image put on social media 1,300 times before the age of 13 – I can see this trajectory for my kids unless I put on the brakes. There are already widespread concerns over the data. In France, an anti-sharing bill continues to be discussed in the country’s senate, and parents could potentially be banned from sharing photos of their children on social media. It could also become mandatory for influencers to admit if a photo or video they posted was retouched or filtered. There is controversy over whether pictures of kids should even be posted online at all, as many are too young to even give permission. How will they feel about the spread of their image in the future? What happens if their identity is stolen – or worse, used by paedophiles? Does it promote a distorted reality of motherhood, compared with which other “normal” mums feel inadequate? And can it backfire on the parents when children’s rights in the digital era are not honoured? “Children tend to be frustrated or critical of the way their parents share images of them,” says Professor Sonia Livingstone, from the department of media and communications at the London School of Economics and Political Science. “Not because they are made to seem ‘perfect’ but because they can be embarrassed, even shamed, in the eyes of their peers. Meanwhile, parents feel hugely under pressure in many ways, both to be perfect parents and also because such images leave parents competing with each other and isolated in their own seemingly inadequate lives.” Dr Cosmo Duff Gordon is the founder of leading addictions clinic Start2Stop, and a psychologist in private practice at Chelsea Recovery Associates. He says that in his 20-year career as a psychologist, he’s “never had a parent sit in front of him and say ‘I’m addicted to Instagram,’” but that’s not because social media addiction doesn’t exist. He puts it largely down to “denial” – “not least since the use of social media can involve so many of the processes that usually characterise classic alcohol or drug addiction”. Denial being the number one culprit. “Obvious ones might be obsession, compulsion, capture of attentional focus and loss of control,” he says. “More subtly, social media use can involve the same sort of self-medication, or escape from reality, that addiction offers – and being a parent is hard. That’s why drifting into a fantasy land can be a relief from the daily grind of motherhood.” Parenting expert Hannah Keeley – aka “America’s #1 Mom Coach” – is more upbeat about mums posting potentially inauthentic photos of their kids. “The hardest truth to accept is that there are some mums who are actually professionalising motherhood to this level,” she says. “Not that they have achieved perfection, but they take pride in their performance as mums and use social media as a way to confirm that to themselves and boost their confidence to encourage their efforts. Should these mums also be obligated to ensure that all mums feel good about themselves, whether or not they have invested in their career to this level? Mums don’t have to be responsible for other mums’ perceptions.” After great debate and reflection, I’ve decided I’m happy with my Insta posts. They might be driven by my background, where my sister and I ran around in white nightdresses as if we had starring roles in Picnic at Hanging Rock. Or because I was conditioned to believe that how we look – even how thin we were – equalled self-worth. I’m not setting myself up to be a supermum. I don’t look at how many likes I get. It’s true that us mums also need to share our parenting experiences honestly, to let other mums know they are not alone. But for now, I’m not doing a U-turn – I’m just living the fairytale dream. Read More My daughter’s horsey hobby makes her happy, but our home now hums If poachers make the best gamekeepers, do siblings make the best babysitters? 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Martin Brundle believes that Formula 1 can create a series of “thrilling” Saturdays in 2024 by making tweaks to the sprint races. Introduced during the 2021 F1 season, the condensed races were designed to provide a short, fast-paced spectacle to enhance the standard Sunday racing. Having been trialled at three events that year and in 2022, the number of sprints on the calendar was doubled ahead of this season, with the format also adapted to no longer set the grid for Sunday’s race and instead operate as a standalone event for which points were awarded. The six sprints this season have consisted of sprint qualifying on Saturday morning before the sprint race later in the day, with grand prix qualifying held on a Friday. Fans, however, have questioned the revamp, while Mercedes team principal Toto Wolff has admitted that the current system is “confusing”. F1 bosses are contemplating restructuring the weekend schedule for next year, perhaps by moving race qualifying until Saturday afternoon and holding the sprint race that morning. And Sky Sports pundit Brundle believes that could create a spectacular day of action for spectators to enjoy. “The sprint format will be tweaked for next year and qualifying for the main race will revert to Saturday afternoon, I suspect,” former F1 driver Brundle explained in his Sky Sports column. “Saturday will become a thrilling day should they schedule the sprint race in the morning and qualifying in the afternoon, although teams will be nervous of having sufficient time to repair any damage from the morning event. “Friday will then be one practice session in the morning, which I believe should revert to 90 minutes, and the Sprint Shootout qualification in the afternoon. Another very decent day for the fans trackside and watching on TV or online. “That chronology flows more logically, and tyre allocations should be standardised for every weekend - we already talk more than enough about tyres.” The final sprint race of the season was won by Red Bull’s Max Verstappen at the Brazilian Grand Prix, with the Dutchman subsequently extending his unassailable advantage at the top of the Drivers’ Championship standings with race victory. Verstappen has now won seven of the 12 sprint races since the format’s introduction at the 2021 British Grand Prix. The Red Bull driver has admitted, though, that he is not entirely enamoured with the extra racing, but Brundle believes that it is here to stay and significantly better than the traditional three free practice schedule. “I see a lot of social media traffic, as well as talking with fans, friends, and media, where many say they don’t like sprint format at all,” Brundle outlined. “Despite being a pure racer and having won many of them, Verstappen says the same. “That’s all valid opinion, but the TV audience numbers show a lot more eyeballs watching these ‘appointments to view’ live sport. And that’s fact. “As I said in our shows, the worst Sprint will always be better than the best FP2, because in free practices nothing is decided, and the teams need to keep the cars well apart on track and use as little tyre and power unit life as possible. The sprints simply must be more entertaining trackside too for those splashing their hard-earned cash. “The whole sprint format needs sharpening up schedule wise, and then it can likely work at a few more circuits. Let’s see what the F1 Commission come up with after their meeting in Abu Dhabi.” The Formula 1 season will conclude with back-to-back race weekends in Las Vegas and Abu Dhabi on 18 and 26 November. Read More Max Verstappen thwarts Lando Norris’s bid for first F1 win in Brazil sprint Lewis Hamilton makes dispiriting Red Bull prediction ‘for next couple of years’ Toto Wolff blasts ‘horrible’ and ‘unacceptable’ Mercedes form after Lewis Hamilton struggles Machine Gun Kelly defends bizarre clash with F1 presenter at Brazilian Grand Prix Martin Brundle responds to bizarre Machine Gun Kelly dispute Machine Gun Kelly storms off after bizarre ‘air guitar’ exchange with Martin Brundle

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Beyond all the hype and razzle-dazzle beaming from all corners of this bright-light epicentre in the middle of the Nevada desert, what Formula 1 needed from their new flagship event on the Las Vegas strip was an entertaining race. Especially after starting on such unimpressive footing a few nights ago. And contrary to many of the processions in this one-sided season, the entertainment capital of the world did deliver on Saturday night. Don’t be fooled though: the top spot of the podium was no surprise. It has got to the stage now where Max Verstappen is simply inevitable. In this breed of Red Bull car, he remains lightyears ahead of the other 19 drivers behind him. On Saturday night – on a circuit he described as “National League” standard after qualifying – he was hit with a five-second penalty. Then he, unusually, spurned his first set of tyres as pole-sitter Charles Leclerc retook the lead. The Dutchman then collided with George Russell in the midfield. Yet no circumstance is too damaging to recover from and, by lap 36 of 50, Verstappen was in the lead and clear. “Viva Las Vegas!” he screeched over team radio at the end, his mood unsurprisingly glowing following an 18th victory of the season. But at least Leclerc gave the 105,000-strong crowd something to cheer at the finale. In front of hospitality boxes at the Bellagio Fountains costing $12,000 for the weekend, the Ferrari man boldly dived down the inside to take second place from the helpless Sergio Perez on the final lap; the second race running that Perez has dropped a spot at the death. It was the absorbing end Vegas executives craved. And needed. A race week so long amped up to the max, from Wednesday’s opening ceremony to UFC ring announcer Bruce Buffer’s cringey driver introductions before lights out, made headlines for all the wrong reasons on day one. The fallout from a loose drain cover on the mesmerising strip section of the track eight minutes into practice was mammoth. The reaction from F1 and LVGP did not help their image either, given their refusal to dish out refunds which should have been obligatory. But to some extent, it was all about the main event. Much like memorable fight nights at the MGM Grand and beyond in this city, 10pm on Saturday night is when the curtains are finally drawn back and the sporting show itself delivers its masterpiece. F1 provided its usual jolt of stardom in the build-up, with David Beckham, Usain Bolt and Kylie Minogue among the numerous A-list celebrities on the grid. But when it came down to the racing, this 17-turn circuit with the second-longest straight on the calendar did not disappoint. There were two safety cars – a usual tool of adding intrigue – after Lando Norris’ early crash and Verstappen’s collision with Russell. There were three leaders, all of whom had time to dream that they would be the first Vegas winner since Italian driver Michele Alboreto won the Caesars Palace car park race in 1982. Safety car No 2 – ironically caused by debris on track following Verstappen’s tangle with Russell – derailed Leclerc’s chances as he stayed out on relatively new hard tyres, while the Red Bull pairing pitted for fresh rubber. The process of heating the tyres afterwards came too slow for the Monegasque and it looked as though another Red Bull one-two was a formality. But, just in time, he found the requisite grip and speed to make one of the overtakes of the season just before the chequered flag. His emotions, he admitted afterwards, were mixed. “On one hand I’m extremely happy with today’s performance, I didn’t leave anything on the table,” Leclerc said. “On the other hand, obviously disappointed because I really believe without this safety car the win was ours.” TOP-10 - LAS VEGAS GRAND PRIX 1. Max Verstappen 2. Charles Leclerc 3. Sergio Perez 4. Esteban Ocon 5. Lance Stroll 6. Carlos Sainz 7. Lewis Hamilton 8. George Russell 9. Fernando Alonso 10. Oscar Piastri Leclerc’s wait for a first win since July 2022 – and he’s had eight pole positions in that time – goes on while Perez secured second in the world championship despite that final dropped spot: the first time Red Bull have ever claimed the top two positions. Further down the order, Esteban Ocon secured an impressive fourth place for Alpine from 16th on the grid while Lance Stroll completed the top five. The Mercedes duo of Lewis Hamilton and Russell came only seventh and eighth respectively as they draw to a close a season to forget, with just one more unlikely attempt to salvage a win in Abu Dhabi next week. But for Vegas – a city completely changed and reordered for this first race of a scheduled 10 – the final act was, finally, worthy of the hysteria. It was up there with the best races of the year, alongside Singapore and Austin. There are plenty of features to be improved, though. The top three drivers all spoke in the aftermath about an earlier start time, as well as perhaps a change of month given the ludicrous time-zone switch now to the Middle East. Logistically, the smoothness of proceedings has been questionable. Yet the glistening glow of the views overhead sparkled and, on race day, the action on the city’s streets matched it. All Sin City, and the sport, needs now is a proper battle at the top. Read More Lando Norris explained issues with Las Vegas circuit before crashing at Grand Prix F1’s Lando Norris expresses Las Vegas Grand Prix track concerns moments before crash Lando Norris endures heavy crash at start of Las Vegas Grand Prix F1 Las Vegas Grand Prix LIVE: Verstappen wins as Leclerc overtakes Perez on last lap What Charles Leclerc needs to claim victory from pole in first Las Vegas Grand Prix Charles Leclerc lights up Las Vegas to claim pole position for Ferrari

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