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Defining Dishes is an IndyEats column that explores the significance of food at key moments in our lives. From recipes that have been passed down for generations, to flavours that hold a special place in our hearts, food shapes every part of our lives in ways we might not have ever imagined. I run a TikTok called @ghostlyarchive, where I share recipes from gravestones mainly across the US that I make and eat. It all started in 2021, while the Covid pandemic was still ongoing. I was studying to be a librarian. One of my classes was about social media and we were tasked with creating a fresh social media account and had to pick a niche. At the same time, for the same library programme, I had to choose a library or an archive to intern with. I found a fairly virtual internship that let me do things safely outside and in person – which was at a cemetery. I ended up interning in a cemetery archives at a congressional cemetery in Washington DC, and this ended up being my social media niche, too. I chose TikTok, which I was new to at the time, and the class required me to post something about my niche every day for three months. So I learnt that there was a whole section of TikTok called “GraveTok”, where there were gravestone cleaners, preservationists and historians posting content, as well as people who just really loved cemeteries and the storytelling around them. I was posting everyday, and when you post everyday, eventually you’re just sharing anything that you come across that’s vaguely interesting. So at first, it was just about the internship, then I moved on to featuring other gravestones in DC. I started sharing any interesting grave or memorial that I was learning about, and that’s how I heard about Naomi Odessa Miller-Dawson’s grave recipe. Naomi has a really beautiful gravestone in Brooklyn, New York. It’s shaped like an open cookbook and features ingredients for her signature spritz cookies, a type of butter cookie that is made using a cookie press. I remember seeing a photo of Naomi’s gravestone and wondering what they tasted like. Because it was during pandemic times, when we had a lot more free time, I had been learning how to cook more and became really curious about this recipe. So I made them, shared the process on TikTok, and it exploded overnight. People were really intrigued by the grave recipe. In the comments, they were asking questions like: “I didn’t know this, who makes these? Are there other gravestones like this?” Or sharing their own experiences saying: “My mum has a really good recipe” or “This is how I make my cookies”. After that, I learned more about who Naomi was and while I was doing that, I was learning about other gravestones with recipes on them that were featured in local blog posts or posted to Twitter, or even on local news. That’s where the project originated. I’ve now made 23 grave recipes, but that first one was such a journey and I’ll remember it forever. The very first time I made the spritz cookies, I baked them incorrectly because there were no instructions on the gravestone and I didn’t know what a spritz cookie was. I made them in little circles and later learned from people commenting on the video that I was supposed to use a cookie press, so I bought one and made them again. They are really beautiful, delicate little butter cookies that you can decorate. I initially thought they were a sort of sugar cookie, because that’s what the ingredient list sounded like to me, but when I figured out what they were and the proper way to make them, it was such a revelation. Eventually, I met Naomi’s family and made her recipe with them. It was so interesting to learn about her family. I felt very honoured that they welcomed me and took the time to talk about who this woman was and what she meant to them. Naomi was the matriarch of her family and an excellent cook. No one was allowed to bring takeaway food into her home because she would say: “I can cook better than anything you can get at a restaurant.” Her son talked about sitting at the counter in her kitchen, just waiting for the cookies to come out of the oven so he could have a freshly baked one immediately, and he did the same thing when we were cooking together. I often think about how the recipes that get put on these graves are such a big part of family food traditions, which is very cool to me. When I met Naomi’s son and granddaughter, who now live in Pennsylvania, we drove past her old house and visited her grave in the cemetery and heard stories about her. I felt close to Naomi, even though I’d never met her. There’s something about food that connects you to so many memories and people of the past. For example, I’ve never met my great-grandparents, but my mother still cooks her grandmother’s recipes and she still talks about this person when she cooks them. It’s a really interesting connection to the tastes, smells and sights that my great-grandmother, who was an Irish immigrant, had. Weirdly, she is actually buried in the same cemetery as Naomi! There is something about food that makes us feel more present with our deceased loved ones. I don’t know what it is, but food has this amazing quality to do that. Other grave recipes that I’ve tried and continue to make include a fudge recipe from Utah and a snickerdoodle recipe from California. I’ve also made two grave recipes from Israel, which were both written in Hebrew. One of them just had the ingredients on it and his widow told the press that if you know how to cook, you’ll know what to do with them. Well, apparently I don’t know how to cook because I had no idea! Luckily, I work part time at the American Jewish University and their librarians both read and speak Hebrew, so they helped me translate the grave. They decided it was a type of mildly sweet yeasted bread and I’ve made it a few times now, it’s really delicious. My friends have asked for that one very frequently because it’s really an objectively good bread. Most of the recipes that end up on graves tend to be baked goods, or sweet recipes, there are a lot of cookies, cakes, pies, cobbler, ice cream. There are a few savoury ones, like a meatloaf, two cheese dips, and a chicken soup. But the rest of them are pretty much desserts. I think they are chosen according to what is comforting for those who are still around. They think: “My grandma made this thing and I immediately associate that thing with her, or my mum or dad, or whoever”. They have a signature dish and get excited when they think about it, and I think that’s how they choose what to put on the grave. Rosie Grant is an archivist currently living in Los Angeles. She visits cemeteries with grave recipes whenever she travels, and shares her process for making these recipes on her TikTok, @ghostlyarchives. Read More The dish that defines me: Michele Pascarella’s Neapolitan ragu The dish that defines me: Evelin Eros’s rum cake The dish that defines me: Mallini Kannan’s baked honey-soy salmon Is there such a thing as British pizza? Courgette season is nearly over – here’s three ways to make the most of them How to cook to keep your gut healthy

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Devotees claim eyelash growth serums are the Holy Grail, giving you long, fluttery lashes that will have your friends wondering if you’re wearing falsies. It will probably come as no surprise that TikTok has been flooded with videos from users showing off their impressive transformations after several weeks of daily use, with 114m views under the search ‘lash growth serum’. There’s now a huge variety of products on the market – from big name beauty brands to companies that specialise in lashes and brows – and prices vary massively. But do they really work for everyone? Experts run through everything you need to know about lash-boosting serums… What is the science behind eyelash growth serums? All lash serums, whether they’re applied like eyeliner or with a mascara-style wand, are designed with essentially the same aim. “To promote the growth of natural lashes, resulting in longer and thicker lashes with regular use,” says Nima Pourian, founder of UKLash. “By nourishing and moisturising the lashes with ingredients like Panthenol, peptides, and biotin”, serums can “enhance the absorption of nutrients into the bloodstream, leading to healthier and fuller lashes”. Some serums on the market contain hormones called prostaglandins – or a synthetic version – that extend the growth phase of the lash cycle, meaning the hairs get longer before they fall out. Others, such as The Ordinary’s Multi-Peptide Lash and Brow Serum, use peptides to achieve the same aim without hormones. Gabriella Elio, founder of Sweed Beauty, came up with a hormone-free serum after learning some people can “get allergic reactions, pigmentations and are sensitive to serums since they contain prostaglandins”. As with any new beauty product you’re trying, it’s sensible to perform a patch test first. “Although reactions are rare, the eye area can be sensitive, so it’s best to check for any sensitivity beforehand,” says Pourian. “Apply a small amount of the serum to a small area, such as a corner of the forehead, behind the ear, or the side of the neck. Wait approximately 24 hours to observe any skin sensitivity.” It’s particularly important to be careful with products used so close to the eyes, so do your research and buy from a reputable retailer. How long does it take to see results? “The time it takes to see results may vary individually, depending on the stage of the lash growth cycle when the serum is started,” says Pourian. “That’s why it is recommended to use eyelash and eyebrow serums once a day for eight to 12 weeks, which aligns with a full growth cycle.” You’ll have to be patient, because you can’t simply double up to get lengthy lashes twice as fast. “It is crucial to follow the instructions provided with the serum and avoid overuse,” he continues. “Like any other topical skincare product, proper usage and adherence to the recommended application frequency will ensure the best results.” Do you have to keep using the serum forever? “If you discontinue using the product your lashes will continue to go through their natural growth and shedding phases,” says Claire Larsen, global master educator at RevitaLash Cosmetics. “So the new lashes that come back in will be untreated and will appear the way they originally did before starting your lash serum. If you love the results, you are a lifer!” However, you can reduce the frequency of use once you reach the maintenance phase. Pourian advises: “Once you have achieved your desired results, it is recommended to use the lash serum three to four times a week to maintain the length and health of your lashes.” Are there any reasons why a serum might not work? Proper application is key to making sure the serum can get to work quickly and effectively. “If the serum is not applied properly, such as being applied like mascara instead of reaching the roots and hair follicles, it may not yield desired results,” says Pourian. “It’s important to avoid using other products like oil-based cleansers or serums before applying the lash serum, as they can create a barrier, preventing proper absorption.” And remember, you’ve got to be consistent with daily use for at least a few weeks before you’ll see a noticeable difference. “Certain medical conditions, health issues, hormonal changes and lifestyle factors can influence the results of lash serums,” Pourian adds, meaning your lashes might not reach TikTok-worthy proportions, or may take longer to do so. “Genetics also play a role, as individuals naturally have different hair, lash, or brow growth genetics. This doesn’t mean the serum won’t work at all, but it may result in less significant outcomes.” Go long: 8 highly-rated lash serums to try 1. The Ordinary Multi-Peptide Lash and Brow Serum, £12.40, LookFantastic 2. L’Oreal Paris Clinically Proven Lash Serum, £11.99 (was £14.99), Superdrug 3. Mavala Double Lash Night Treatment, £17.50, Boots 4. UKLash Eyelash Serum, £37.99 5. RapidLash Eyelash Enhancing Serum, £39.99, Escentual 6. Sweed Beauty Eyelash Growth Serum, £42 7. Olaplex Lashbond Building Serum, £64 8. RevitaLash Advanced Sensitive Eyelash Conditioner, £109 Read More Charity boss speaks out over ‘traumatic’ encounter with royal aide Ukraine war’s heaviest fight rages in east - follow live Sex Education star Patricia Allison: I’ve learned boundaries are extremely important Non-binary influencers share what they wish people understood about their experience Camilla will not receive £360,000 annuity from parliament like Prince Philip did

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