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Getting married wasn’t “on the books” for London couple Craig Pollard and Alex Herd for a long time. But that changed when Alex got diagnosed with motor neurone disease (MND) in 2021, aged 30. “We decided to get married as a bit of a consequence of Alex’s diagnosis,” explains Pollard, 35. “It wasn’t something that was on the books for us before, especially as being gay, marriage wasn’t available to us when we were younger, so wasn’t necessarily something we’d aspired to. “But then thinking about the legacy we wanted and how much time we had together, we saw it as a good way of bringing our families together and celebrating something really positive in our life.” MND affects nerves in the brain and spinal cord which send signals to muscles. There is currently no cure, so as muscle loss gets worse over time – affecting movement, speech, swallowing and breathing – it eventually leads to death. It’s uncommon and mostly affects people in their 60s and 70s, although as Herd’s diagnosis shows, MND can occur in younger adults too. The charity Challenging MND, which helps people with MND, has the ‘opportunity to create amazing memories’, funded the couple’s big day last year – a fabulous festival-inspired party officiated by drag queen Just May from RuPaul’s Drag Race UK Season 4. They had already been together for a decade, so the wedding was a “celebration of all the things we’ve enjoyed together over the last 10 years”, Pollard notes (plus “lots of glitter and sparkle – it was perfect”). It was also the last time Herd went a full day without using a wheelchair. “So it was the very last moment we possibly could have done that,” adds Herd, now 32. “And we can look back at that as a really special day.” He first started noticing symptoms in early 2021 – muscle twitching then weakness in his hands and arms, before his legs became increasingly affected. Herd used a manual wheelchair for a while but recently switched to an electric one. “That’s changed my life quite a lot,” says Herd. “While I was in the manual wheelchair and Craig was pushing around, I sort of felt like I didn’t really exist anymore, because everyone would interact with him, and I wasn’t responsible for where I was. But now I’m in control of my movement, I feel like I’m more interacting with people myself.” The diagnosis has been challenging on multiple levels, individually and as a couple. MND doesn’t present with exactly the same patterns for everyone – so there is no guidebook as such, and navigating support services relies on a lot of self-advocating. Things such as specialist physiotherapy and occupational therapy can be helpful, along with home adaptations. “Having MND, you have to get used to things changing,” says Herd. “I mean, I can’t necessarily relate at this point to someone who’s been in their wheelchair for their whole life, but because things keep changing, you can’t really get used to it properly. So it’s very difficult for me to kind of keep hold of my identity.” In a recent survey, Challenging MND found 63% of people living with the MND had felt marginalised or ‘othered’ because of their condition, while 51% felt others see MND as their identity. In addition, 80% said they felt isolated, and 69% worry about being a burden to their family. Feeling ‘othered’ is something Alex found himself thinking about while attending Pride London recently. “It’s almost more like something I’m doing, than something other people are doing – because I’m seeing people doing what I would’ve been doing a year ago, it’s still fairly fresh for me, so I’m still comparing the before and after,” he reflects. “At Pride, lots of people get to see themselves represented in the crowds, and that’s nice. But then I realised how much more of a minority people in wheelchairs are. It made us realise how different our situation is now, our priorities and expectations in general.” Music has been an important way for him to stay connected with his identity. “I’ve been making music for over 10 years, so it’s nice I’m still able to do that. I think as much as possible, people in a situation like this need to try and keep doing the things that made them happy before,” he says. While he can no longer play his guitar, Herd made voice recordings to use an instrument and creates tracks on his computer, using foot pedals as he can no longer click the mouse. Since his diagnosis, he’s actually been finishing a lot more songs. “I have less distractions now!” Herd quips. “But using music as a communication tool, that’s definitely become more important to me.” Challenging MND also supported the couple with a trip to Eurovision – “which was really touching and we made great memories”, says Pollard. They’re also grateful to support from the Motor Neurone Disease Association, who provides a local area liaison, and their local St Christopher’s Hospice has been “really helpful”. These things make a huge difference. “Something I’m very conscious of as an able-bodied person is watching Alex have to come to terms with first of all being disabled, then being visibly disabled, and then being disabled in public – there’s been a lot of different elements we’ve had to really tackle,” Pollard reflects, citing navigating public transport as one of the main everyday challenges. There’s an emotional toll too. “My energy levels are a lot lower than they used to be, and my capacity for stress. I feel like I already have this much higher baseline of anxiety about various things, so it feels much easier to become overwhelmed,” says Herd. “I think the only thing we can really do is just try and focus on the next thing, rather than worrying about everything.” As members of the LGBTQ+ community, there are sometimes other nuances to their experiences. They’ve noticed LGBTQ+ events are doing well with accessibility, but representation can be a more subtle matter. “There’s definitely an element of the community who are very mindful of others and very empathetic, which I think has been where I’ve learned a lot about different people’s experiences in my life,” says Pollard. “But when it comes to the overall society of the community, I think there’s still a large proportion of it based on image, based around being cool and trendy. So it’s quite easy for people with accessible requirements to be kind of ignored in that space.” As for their experiences in public, Craig says: “We have struggled to feel like we can take up space. First of all being LGBT, we often don’t feel that safe in certain spaces, public transport we’ve had trouble on once or twice in the past, so you’re always a bit uneasy. With moving into being more visibly disabled and needing more accessible requirements, that’s something we’ve to discuss and manage.” Thanks to Challenging MND, the couple are banking up the joyful times. “They offered to support our wedding, which was really special, and without them we probably wouldn’t have had it,” says Pollard. “That isn’t just a memory for us, it’s a memory for our families and friends too. It was really special.” Challenging MND aims to support and empower those living with MND to create lasting memories for themselves and their families. To date they’ve granted in excess of £1.1million and supported over 100 families.

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In a number of scenes in 2001’s Bridget Jones’s Diary, our heroine – a thirtysomething singleton played by Renée Zellweger – squashes the skin of her lower torso into an array of Lycra shapewear, all in an attempt to make herself appear slimmer. When Hugh Grant’s Daniel Cleaver sets his eyes on her high-wasted, nude-coloured underpants in one memorable scene, Bridget blushes with embarrassment. “Well, hello mummy,” Daniel purrs. At the time of the film’s release, control shapewear – or tummy-tucking underwear designed to smooth its wearer – was marketed predominantly at people like Bridget, someone who was told by society she was “fat” or undesirable unless she had a flat stomach. Today, though, shapewear is branded differently, marketed to young women as a sexy, must-have fashion accessory. Shapewear products are not only promoted as stomach-smoothing fixes, but for anyone who wants a narrow waist or their figure to resemble a contoured, Kardashian-style hourglass. Skims, Kim Kardashian’s self-owned shapewear brand that she founded in 2019, sells viral sculpting bodysuits geared towards achieving this particular body shape. They start at £70. Since the launch of Skims, as with anything that a member of the Kardashian clan wears or makes, fast fashion knock-offs have swelled the market. Online retailer PrettyLittleThing, which has a murky track record of contributing to a harmful cycle of fast fashion, sells duplicates of the Skims viral bodysuit for around £20. They also sell waist trainers – a corset-style casing worn underneath clothes to aggressively teach your waist to be narrow – for just £12. “Doll cinch your waist in an instant with this waist trainer,” the item’s description reads. The product has boning to make it stiff and restrictive. Venture onto TikTok and you’ll find viral dresses with Spanx-style shapewear, designed to minimise the width of a person’s waist and accentuate their bottom, built into the clothing itself. While Skims is not solely responsible for this recent boom in shapewear, it has contributed to transforming how we view it – Bridget’s “granny pants” are now glamorous and aspirational. For the brand’s latest collection, for example, buzzy British singer-songwriters Raye and PinkPantheress were enlisted to promote it, along with viral Bronx rapper Ice Spice. The resulting campaign wouldn’t look out of place in the pages of Vogue. What this marketing tells us is that fashion isn’t just about the garments you wear, but the apparently malleable shape of the body on which they’re worn. Early shapewear emerged in the 16th century, not as a trend or body sculpting device, but for practical support. Karolina Laskowska, a lingerie designer and director of the underwear archive The Underpinnings Museum, tells me that the primary purpose of shapewear back then was to support the body much in the same way that a contemporary bra is made to support the breasts today. “A pair of stays [a corset style bodice] would have offered bust and back support for women who worked,” she explains. “These styles were more functional and supportive, rather than trend-driven.” The beginnings of the shapewear we see today were first seen in the Sixties, when the invention of Lycra, a synthetic-based elastic fibre, allowed for stretchier fabrics. What Laskowska dubs the grandparent of modern shapewear was the “Little X Girdle” by a British brand called Silhouette. “It was a turning point for a shift from traditional structured corsetry into elasticated shapewear,” she says. The item was a seamless, pull-on girdle – an elasticated corset extending from waist to thigh – and was eventually licenced to sell in over 32 countries as turnover increased exponentially. We then saw the evolution of more comfortable, everyday shapewear, like those made by Spanx, an American brand founded in 2000. They’re so uncomfortable, but they’re so afraid of what others will think about them due to their body size Victoria Kleinsman By contrast, modern shapewear is now geared towards sculpting the body to appear differently underneath clothes. And now, fast fashion is getting involved, too. But lingerie designers like Laskowska are increasingly worried about the consumer physically “hurting” themselves with badly made undergarments. “We’ve seen fast fashion adopt corsetry and shapewear trends but it’s not made to fit the human anatomy, since it’s made to be as cheap as possible,” she says. She adds that people could “injure” themselves with elasticated shapewear if they buy a size too small, meaning they could potentially restrict their blood’s circulation. Victoria Kleinsman, a self-esteem expert and body love coach, works with women between the ages of 13 to 60, and says that she’s seen how her younger clientele are feeling the pressure to wear shapewear in order to conform to the cult of thinness. Some clients have bought pantyhose with built-in cushioning to make the bottom look larger and perkier. Others will wear layers of shapewear to sculpt the body, particularly the waist and stomach, to look slimmer or flatter. To Kleinsman, wearing modern shapewear allows people to apply an “IRL [Instagram] filter” to their bodies. She speaks to women each day who are “crying” to her on Zoom calls because they’re worried about what their bodies look like. “It’s to the point when it’s boiling hot weather [but] they’re wearing spandex shapewear and tights, and they’re so uncomfortable, but they’re so afraid of what others will think about them due to their body size.” The expert fell into her line of work after she struggled with an eating disorder – she also wore a waist trainer when she was dealing with her own body image issues. “I would go to the gym wearing it because apparently you ‘sweat more’ and therefore lose ‘water fat’,” she says. “Which is b******! It’s physically painful to your physical body and even more painful to your emotional and mental well-being.” Kleinsman doesn’t think that this type of elasticated shapewear has anything to do with fashion and it should not be marketed as such. “It’s really dangerous,” she tells me. “Shapewear gives you a fake ‘confidence’ but then underneath it all when that comes off, then, who are you?” The popularity of Skims and their various knock-offs doesn’t seem likely to decline any time soon, but Kleinsman is hopeful that more women will soon have epiphanies about the shapewear revival. “Fatphobia and body image trauma is still the norm,” she sighs. “There has never been more [appropriate] a time for us to embrace our natural bodies.” Read More ‘The models are skinnier than ever’: Has London Fashion Week stopped caring about body diversity? 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