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Musician Tom Speight was diagnosed with the long-term bowel condition Crohn’s disease 15 years ago. After undergoing emergency surgery for the condition , he had a stoma connected to his digestive system. As today marks World Inflammatory Bowel Diseases Day (IDB), Speight has opened up about the realities of living with a stoma and debunks 10 common misconceptions about his condition. A stoma is an opening on the abdomen that can be connected to either your digestive or urinary system to allow waste to be diverted out of your body. Stomas are sometimes used after surgery to remove cancers in your pelvic area or help treat inflammatory bowel diseases, such as Crohn’s disease or ulcerative colitis. How does Crohn’s impact on your life and mental health? Over the years, [there have been some] really difficult situations to deal with – I was hospitalised last year while I was making my album, and lying in hospital, not knowing if I was going to be well enough to finish what I’d been working so long and so hard for was really really demoralising. For me, stress is a big trigger, so when you’re stressing about keeping up with everything and keeping on top of things it was actually making me worse. There’s a ripple effect to this disease in that your limitations can affect how others [family and friends] live their life,” he said. “I’ve been having regular therapy since 2019 to help manage my stress and improve my mental health. Working out how to manage the condition is unbelievably frustrating. Finding the right team of doctors, the right medication, and the right diet is such a draining process. For me, one of the hardest parts is knowing that despite everything you try, the trial and error process you go through can ultimately put you back in hospital if it’s not quite right. It can be a scary thought. The prospect of having a third operation or a sixth stay in hospital is always there, at the back of my mind. Here are the 10 most common misconceptions about living with a stoma, according to Speight: 1. Swimming is fine Often people believe that having a stoma means you can’t enjoy the same hobbies and activities that you did before you had the operation. Swimming comes to mind first: I think people presume you’ll have a leakage or accident, but in the 10 years I’ve had the stoma. I’ve never once had a problem. The stoma bag is waterproof and secure due to its adhesive. There’s no reason why a person with a stoma can’t swim with confidence. 2. What you can and cannot eat When I first spoke to my stoma nurse, I asked about my dietary requirements and what to avoid... you’d be surprised about what’s on the forbidden list. Some people may be advised to avoid eating very fibrous foods, or foods with tough outer skins such as sweetcorn, popcorn, peas and potato skins, to avoid causing a blockage in the bowel. Often eating out can feel like a game of Russian roulette. I’ve had many episodes where I’ve been caught out and been absolutely floored in the process. 3. Being visible I was 24 when I first had the emergency surgery to have a stoma. At the time, I thought having the operation would mean my career was over... you can’t be a pop star and have a bag, right? In reality, no one actually will know until you tell them. I’ve worn tight-fitting clothes while channelling my best Freddie Mercury moves and it’s never been a problem. I kind of wish I could tell my younger self that things will be ok and it’s not the end. In some ways, it was just the start, because it gave me a whole new lease of life. 4. ‘Only elderly people have stomas’ I originally thought only old people have stomas, and yes, the elderly are more likely to have a stoma, but surgery can be performed on anybody at any age. I’ve met a number of younger people through the charity Crohn’s & Colitis UK who are just like me, and it’s quite comforting to know you’re not alone. 5. Sex Without being too graphic, this isn’t a problem. It’s all about finding the right partner who can make you feel safe and confident. 6. Smell A lot of the misconceptions about having a stoma were things I initially thought too. I thought it would be unhygienic and, quite frankly, not smell so fresh. The reality is, you’ll only ever notice the smell when you go change it in the toilet. In some ways, it would be no different from anyone else using the loo 7. Is this permanent? For some patients, a stoma is permanent. However, for many, an ostomy is performed to allow for the bowel to heal from scarring, inflammation and infection. I personally need to get to a level of health where a reversal could be performed, while also managing to take some time off to heal properly. 8. ‘You can’t exercise’ I think this misconception might be because people might think you’re vulnerable or weak due to the operation. Exercising regularly can have a really positive impact on people with a stoma, as it reduces the risk of a hernia and keeps your body fit. I’ve never felt stronger in my life. 9. Find the nearest toilet I think people often think you’re walking around with poop all day... this isn’t the case! You just have to go to the toilet like everyone else. 10. The reality is... Yes, it’s a life changing operation but with a few mindful changes you can lead a happy and healthy life. Just avoid the popcorn and drink plenty of water. Read More Ninety-five per cent of Black adults don’t swim – meet the people trying to change that How being seduced by gambling’s love bombing ended with a prison sentence ‘Unproblematic people don’t age’ reflects the stupidest kind of beauty standard Woman, 50, to become a surrogate mother for same-sex couple Doctors dismissed her as a hypochondriac. Then came an incurable diagnosis Festival founder hopes to help tackle women’s health taboos

An internet-wide debate has resulted from one brave woman’s choice to detail her at-home abortion experience on TikTok. On 20 July, a 24-year-old woman named Monica showed her TikTok followers how she completed her abortion, from the comfort of her home, for the first time at nine weeks pregnant. She began by showing the items she needed to prepare her body: the required prescription drug typically used for terminating early pregnancy, motion sickness medicine, a bottle of water, maxi pads, and Planned Parenthood’s timely instructions. “It is highly recommended to take ibuprofen (with food) and anti-nausea pills 30 minutes before your first dose of abortion pills which I did here,” she said. For her first dose, Monica – who already has one daughter – was required to put four pills in the sides of her mouth and keep them there for 30 minutes. Then, she washed down the tablets with water. Speaking with Newsweek, the woman explained why she decided to share her abortion experience using the medications mifepristone and misoprostol, which are typically prescribed to terminate early stages of pregnancy. “My hope would be that abortion becomes more normalised and seen as what it is - healthcare,” she confessed. “I wanted to create a safe space for women to come forward and share their experiences and stories about their abortions without the fear of being judged or criticised.” The 24-year-old continued: “I’ve noticed that the media tends to ignore the topic of abortion as a whole and I thought, ‘Well, maybe if I come forward and share my own journey, we can finally talk about it.’” Her video showing the side effects of using the “abortion pill” - mifepristone and misoprostol, prescribed by Planned Parenthood - has now reached over 3.1m views. However, it’s received mixed emotions and reactions online. @monicathehuman TW: Abortion Pro-Lifers please dni. This is my personal experience with abortion pills and how I prepared for the day. There is a lot left out so if you have any questions please feel free to ask and I’ll do be my best to go into more detail! Side note: I am a 24 year old mother of one. Overall, the pain was at a 10 for me and I have a very high pain tolerance and personally, it felt like being in labor without an epidural. Just note, this experience is NOT expected for everyone! For others it may just feel like a very bad period and I am someone who luckily doesn’t experience period cramps so this is not a usual thing for me! A special shoutout to @Planned Parenthood for helping my experience run smooth and quickly ❤️ My symptoms the first 12 hours: •Slight Nausea in the first 15 min. •Diarrhea •Dizziness •Fatigue after 10 hours My symptoms the morning after: •Spotting Resources: Need to talk to someone about your abortion experience? Text: 617-749-2948 Or Visit: https://www.mahotline.org/ for any info or support to self-manage a miscarriage or abortion #plannedparenthood #abortion #abortionpill #prochoice #abortionexperience #mifepristone #misoprostol ♬ Chopin Nocturne No. 2 Piano Mono - moshimo sound design While some followers thanked Monica for her vulnerability, others were opposed. “Thank you for posting. I’ve never known how these kind of abortions work,” one woman wrote. “Wtf why is this on TikTok?” another person said. “I definitely felt hesitant about documenting my abortion because I was so worried about the kind of response I would get,” Monica told Newsweek. “It was my attempt to reach out to those who may feel alone or unsupported through such a vulnerable event and to show that there is nothing to hide when it comes to making a choice that is best for you.” “In all honesty, when the negativity did start rolling in, I was just so comfortable with my decision that none of them fazed me. There was nothing anyone could have said that would have changed my mind or made me regret posting my video,” she continued. “I helped so many more people than they ever could have with their hatred and that’s what mattered most to me - helping people.” @monicathehuman Here is my abortion follow-up video for everyone wondering what that looks like! Thank you all again for your support and thank you to everyone who felt safe enough to confide in me about their journeys! ❤️ You’re all so loved and this is your reminder that you are NOT alone and you are supported by SO many despite the stigma. Abortion is Healthcare! ?? • • #abortionrights #abortionishealthcare #abortion #abortionjourney #plannedparenthood #prochoice #abortionpill #mifepristone #misoprostol #abortionexperience #aidaccess #plancpills ♬ Chopin Nocturne No. 2 Piano Mono - moshimo sound design Despite the negativity, an overwhelming number of commenters were pleased to see Monica open up about her experience. Many women related to her, and offered their own advice on how to cope emotionally and physically following an abortion. One individual said: “Please priortise your mental health after this process. It could be hard, but you got this. You are strong. You did what was right for you.” “This was so informative. Thanks for sharing your story,” a TikTok user noted, while another added: “Literally saving. Bless you, for showing us the process. I was always terrified of it.” Even commenters from US states such as Texas, Mississippi, and Alabama - where bans or restrictions to abortion access have become increasingly common - encouraged her honesty, despite being located where abortion has now been made illegal and inaccessible. “I think it’s incredibly important for women to share stories like this because in a big way, it helps to destigmatise abortion,” Monica told Newsweek. “Talking to all these women and sharing our stories together also opened my eyes to see just how little support women around the world have when it comes to reproductive health.” @monicathehuman #abortion #abortionrights #abortionishealthcare #abortionjourney #prochoice #abortionexperience ♬ original sound - Moon ? “It’s a right that everyone deserves and a choice that no one should ever make without proper resources and education. It’s heartbreaking when I hear that it’s not available to everyone just anywhere,” the mother said. “In some places, it may even place a danger on people for just talking about it. I felt so powerless with my inability to help them and I can only imagine what they may feel.” She added: “I hope that my video will reach the right people who have had questions about abortion and to hopefully clear the misconceptions and lies surrounding it. It’s not as scary as many people have been taught to believe, and they are not alone.” In 2022, the US Supreme Court officially overturned the decision in Roe v Wade, which protected a woman’s right to an abortion more than 50 years ago. One year later, 13 states have implemented total bans starting from conception, while Georgia has implemented a ban after six weeks. The Independent has reached out to Monica for comment. Read More What the GOP candidates have said about abortion rights Abortion drug case likely headed to Supreme Court after Republican-appointed judges agree to restrict access Are abortions about to be even harder to get? Schoolboy almost dies from swallowing magnets for TikTok challenge Woman shares honest review of New York City apartment TikTok mom slammed after making 5-year-old son run in 104 degree heat

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